abandonment

they were here
I talked with them
mixed messages of life
playful banter
and the like
and they left
they were here
at one time
or another
maybe several times
maybe once
and they left
they were here
keeping me afloat
giving me a purpose
driving me on
and they left
they were here
when my purpose
my drive
became secondary
to them

and they left
me
with
nothing
like
I
will
leave
them
with
nothing
more

they were here
and I lost sight
about why
I was here
I'll stay
and
leave
them
behind

Autumn

The light slowly fades
like his breath
he focuses for one second
on the beauty that is around him
the world ablaze with the remnants
of abundant life
no longer fertile, but necessary

unlike him

he smiles and shuts his eyes
a final time

Soundtrack

Baby, why the Rush?
Who is it you need to see?
You’ve been living in some sort of Dream Theater lately
In such a Deep purple funk too
Are you afraid of some unseen Lynch Mob?
Is life just a torture device, an Iron Maiden only for you?
Why should you be such a mystery, an Enigma to me?
Sit awhile, I’ll make your favorite dish –
You know, the one with the Red Hot Chili Peppers
Afterwards we can take a walk, maybe find that Bush
Where we shared our first Kiss before you left for Boston
You said you had to go, something about some Bad Religion
I understood completely, even if it drove nine inch nails into my heart
You played it perfectly, like those Spin Doctors in Washington
You left me on Skid Row, Smashing Pumpkins
It was a gourd Slaughter, but I started to feel better
Now you’re back, with all this New Found Glory
Better than Ezra, or ever, you used to say
Well, I know you’re Naughty by Nature
And lies used to drip from your Flaming Lips
But after you had joined the Trans Siberian Orchestra
Your days of being a Cheap Trick were over
Our Collective Soul received a virtual Air Supply
We shared some Cake, Meat Loaf and laughs
It felt so very Tantric
I knew I had your Heart
I know this is Overkill, but let me in
It’s Human Nature to be scared
We can go to the Police
They can get a Warrant, you’ll be safe
No need for Widespread Panic
This world is Vast
Not by Default, it’s because I love you
I’d buy you everything from Guns and Roses
To Gorillaz
Or maybe your favorite Jewel
There’s an Unwritten Law between us
One that a House of Lords couldn’t break
Our own Trust Company, you and I
3 doors down from 10,000 Maniacs
You bring the offense and I’ll have the Tenacious D
It will be XTC
I will be your Tool for redemption
You will be my Fuel for revenge
Say a prayer to Ra
Tour this Big Country in Cars
Don’t be Disturbed by the Lost Prophets
And don’t drink the Everclear
An escape is always near, only 30 seconds to Mars
We can take your Atomship with Ziggy Stardust
If we stay here, and this is just a Theory of a Dead Man
The Dead Can Dance on our graves
Before the Darkness falls
Leave the Killers behind
Intergalactic Supertramp,
A few Talking Heads,
And one Def Leppard

We’re going home…

**** Okay this is really goofy and off the wall. I admit it. But it was a lot of fun. ****

Inspired by, Part IV: you

I overheard a comment, maybe a remark.
It could have been in line at the store, at the bank, when you were on your cell phone. It caught my attention, so I remembered it. And jotted it down.

You had the most unusual, or pained, or joyous expression. You smiled and laughed, a true moment of pleasure. Or maybe you cried, or bit back the tears of pain, frustration, denial. I took note.

Your eyes left an imprint on my brain, or maybe your smile. Your neck, your walk, your legs.

You showed strength, weakness, honesty, courage, apathy, anger - all those traits that separate us from chimps.

You talked with your child, and listened intently.

You ignored the elderly lady that needed help, practically pushing her down in your rush.

You held your head at an odd angle.

You drive a school bus.

You rushed out the door at 5 pm.

I watched you pick out videos for another sad Friday night; you kept eyeing that couple, you know the ones, holding hands and kissing, with digust. And envy.

I saw you on trial.

I saw you after you were born, and when you died.

You probably never saw me, and you probably never will.

Still, you are all here, living in my words, slowly released from my mind.

I will set you all free.

In due time.

Dead wrong

The weight of my eagerness compels me forth
Even though my eyes are unfocused and my mind is drifting

I will make it through this ordeal, I will finished what I started
That’s the way I live and the way it should be
Unless I die at the wheel. Then you can say you were right
And I was wrong.

unobserved

I moved through the room
and you didn't say a word
I left for a while
you didn't ask where I had gone
I took a nap on the floor
and you stepped right on by
I stared at the ceiling and listened
while you slept peacefully

The soft whisper of each breath
played upon my ears
I could smell the shampoo on your hair
tropical & pleasant
a few strands of hair fall across your cheek
perfect and alluring
the swell of your breast peeks out
from the top of your nightshirt
your curves intoxicate me
- from your jawline to your calves -
no hard angles, everything elegant
like your eyes

eyes that would be perfect
so deep, dark, compassionate
eyes that could have everything
if they could only see me