Irreversable

I wrote because
a bullet to the head
wasn't possible

but I wouldn't have stopped it

I don't have guns
for that reason

I have no desire to die
but there are times
I die
before really dying

I have been moved
by emotion
hormones
imbalance
life

I had moved
relocated
reset
readjusted

but am still
here
adjusted
maladjusted
reset
beset
on all sides
by

well you know
that old chestnut

I didn't
but did
want
to die

a walking
talking
dead man

immortal mortal

conflicted
constricted
without hope
yet hopeful

how fucked up is that?

I still have
to be careful

what I write might get read

and reread

retread

and someone might actually
care
and be there

when I am gone

or before that happens
a flash of lightning
a brief glimmer of hope

sometimes that is all I need
to release
the trigger

of the gun
I do not own
and will never posses




because I know what will happen

irreversible
action

anchors

too long adrift
on a pointless journey
this precious gift
a pointless journey

tied a little too tight
limiting movement
want to break free
limited movement

the anchors that tie us down
set us free
anchors that close us in
open us up
anchors that prevent movement
push us along
anchors that weigh so heavily
lighten our load

lighten our load

ideas way too stiff
for flexibility
souls way too bereft
inflexibility

cornerstone
built upon drifting sand
time flies by
cascading, drifting sand

the anchors that tie us down
set us free
anchors that close us in
open us up
anchors that prevent movement
push us along
anchors that weigh so heavily
lighten our load

lighten our load

that which weighs so heavily
sets us free