Scorched earth

 The tears that wet my cheeks

Mean nothing within my reach

But i will be strong

As long

As i can

No matter what

The others say

It's never going away

The vibes are wrong 

Scorched earth

Scorched earth 

Everywhere

The darkness settles deep

Exposing the soft underneath 

The vanishing whispers

Leave scars so deep

Maybe the spark is missing

Maybe it was never there

History influences the future

Is there is enough to even care?

Bitter tastes leave a heartbreak open

No one expects the ending here

Better times can still get had

There is nowhere but up from here

Dreams spawn everywhere 

The bitter end

I wanna fight

Kick some booty

Take flight

Steal some loot, see

I brought my A game

You brought a baseball bat

We headed to the meeting

I don't know about that 

Still we are here

We persevere 

Until

The bitter end

Dizziness of my existence

Consuming death a little at a time

Swallowing darkness like its wine

Averting my eyes to the truth

Not owning up to what is mine

Confusion the likely cause

Confessions sound like blame

Emotions riding very high

Nothing will ever be the same

Inky black intentions arise

Giving birth to new terrors

New dimensions seen through virgin eyes

A life filled with senseless errors

Consuming life a little at a time

Swallowing pride for those whom I pine

Averting my gaze to absolute truth

Owning what is clearly not mine

Confusion blurs barely visible lines

Confessions show life is so unfair

Emotions denied time after time

Nothing seems to achieve care

Intentions shine with your words

Miracles like a virgin birth

Dimensions rounded like a curve

Can never achieve my true worth

Collision

Lace and shadows

Barely underneath

Fate and fortune

We barely make ends meet

Ends meet

Heart and emotion

Forgotten innocence 

Luck and good genes

We barely make any sense

No sense

Collision course with repeated history

This is on both you and me

Collision course with inevitable screams

From between both you and me

Fear and drinking

Steer me leeward

Grief and hunger

We keep digging deeper

Too deep

Death and salvation

Sold on late night TV

Health and decay

We're digging our own graves

Not okay

Collision course with repeated history

This is on both you and me

Collision course with inevitable screams

From between both you and me

Collision course with revisionist history

This is on both you and me

Collision course with unreliable seams

Tearing apart both you and me

Ends meet, no sense

Too deep, we're not okay

I am, section 16, July 2026

I am,

Not the boldest,

The oldest,

Nor the coldest

I am,

Not the shiest,

Or the driest,

Nor the spry-est,

Of beings.

But somehow, 

Despite my limitations

 (to include, but not limited to, night blindness, incontinence,  anal leakage, vision failure,  erectile dysfunction,  heart palpitations,  shortness of breath,  seizures,  cone, kidney failure,  liver stones,  temporary blindness,  skin lesions, lung cancer, throat cancer, bone cancer, blood cancer, heart cancer, love cancer (it kills very slowly), pancreatic explosion (super rare, but noticeable enough to mention), aneurism, additional limbs, third eye (blind...duh), stuttering, lying, cheating, masterbatory dreams, sweat soaked sheets, fantasies, realities, alternate reality, multiplicity, duplicity, and single hardcore porn videos and websites,  fruit allergies,  turkey fears, nightmares, vomiting,  vomiting from nightmares,  nightmare causing vomiting, shingles, the plague,  mites, mice, hamsters in the ass, lice may occur....

As well as....

Loss of hair, motor function, autonomy, systematic controls, the swing arm, balance,  hearing, sight, urinary function (you're gonna pee yourself), flatulence,  constipation,  consternation,  participation , and free will 

May be 

Questioned, missing, suspended, mispronounced,  misinterpreted,  miss thang,  misty waters may bring summer showers but the focus is on

Me 

My dysfunction 

Function

Wants

Desires

Denied

Deprived

Undesired

I am

Coming

For

You

My mind

I wish you could be here

To see the epic match inside

Battles and quests, here and there

I face every single day

My mind is so configured

To balance the wrong and right

My heart, so disfigured 

Unaware of it's own might

If you could see

And feel

What i feel

If you could taste

And smell

What I can

You would unveil 

The mystery 

My mind

Maybe

I heard a hundred thousand reasons

For the way our lives devolved

I heard a million more excuses

It disrespects all of us involved

But I gave the benefit of doubt

I hoped we could work it all out

Maybe

When the stars freeze over

Maybe

When the hells arise

Maybe 

When the hurting ends

Maybe

Maybe I'll survive

I cried a Hundred thousand teardrops

Life pours from my eyes 

I've tried a million different ways

To keep up this disguise

I gave the best parts if me away

I hoped that the love would have stayed

 Maybe

When the hells freeze over

Maybe

When the stars arise

Maybe 

When the healing begins

Maybe I'll survive

Don't tell it's different now

Because I feel the same

As I always did

As I always will

(Chorus 2x)

Down

The water gets deep around here

We tread uncertainty and fear

But the freedom that we've gained

Should be enough for us to sustain

The pull

Under

You grab my hand, I grab my heart

You pull away, we drift apart

I don't like what's going on

We're going down

The air is crisp around here

We breathe in with no fear

But changes creep around the bend

And the signal, it's the end

The pull

Under

You grab my heart, I grasp your hand

We pull away, you drift too far

You like what's going on 

We're going down 

You grasp your breathe, I clasp my head

We pull too far, we drift apart

We hate what's going on 

We're gonna drown

We hate what's going 

We're going down

You grasp my hand, I grasp for you

We close our eyes

We're going

Down 

I am, part 15

I am,

Lost

Confused

Lonely

Horny 

Stupid

Careful

Split

Tearing apart

Falling apart 

Denying myself 

Of what makes me happy

To make you happy

But you don't seem happy

What's the point?

Why?

I'm becoming an empty shell feeding on

Hope

Stupid hope

What the fuck is wrong with me?

What the fuck is wrong with us?

What the fuck am I doing anymore?

I feel so stupid

And taken for granted, but mostly stupid

Because

I keep taking it

And keep waiting

Like something will change 

For me

For the better

Stupid stupid man

I am, 

Stupid and weak

Letting go

Maybe it's time to move on

I've been waiting so long

I don't know what I'm 

Waiting for anymore 

Maybe it's time I gave up

I've  been  wanting so long

I don't know what I'm 

Longing for anymore

I lost myself somewhere 

Sometime

I've given up on

Me

I've lost my way

And I can't see straight 

What will become of me

As i drift away?

No, no, not again

Not the same trap

The same fears

The unspilled tears

Maybe I need to

Move on

It's not about me

It's rarely about us

And I am lost 

Again

Expressions of you

Your fingers twitch

When you sleep

You catch your breath

With the need

Your furrowed brow

When you think

Sends me to the edge

To the brink

Expressions of you

Your smile shines

With a Frenchie pup

You can never get

Get enough

The closed eyes

Of a sleeping angel

Your closed eyes

My angel

Expressions of you

I am, part fourteen

 I am...Still here

maybe high

Maybe more

But I reach a clean hand out

To clasp yours, and I say

Welcome to the nothingness 

The everything 

The valley of my being

Welcome home 

My friend

Center stage

 Show me where to stand

Dictate what I should say

The unforgiving regret

Takes center stage

The beast untamed 

Takes center stage

For all the world to see

To judge

To set free

If the hearts desire

But savage sensibility

Takes center stage

Night

 How many miles traveled 

Watching the asphalt

As it unravels under wheel

The stars rotate 

Without a given guide

Gravity, unified

The closed eyes stare

Calls it a night 

The heart anywhere

Calls it a night

Unspoken disagreement 

Spoken admiration

Where's the admission of termination?

The stars fade away

Without a warning

Gravity, unfortunately felt

The open eyes stare

Calling only at night

The heart felt elsewhere

Calls it a night

Wake up lonely again

Escape comes from within

Bleeding emotions 

The open heart dares

Calling upon familiarity 

The heart slowly dies

Calls it a night

Don't give in

To the night

Shadows dance

In the night

Don't give up 

Into the night

What's next

 Reality isn't everything 

It may never be the truth

What can we do about it?

Moving on

Tear it up

Scream aloud

Punch a pillow

Or maybe a face

Set it afire

Design a plan

Exploded emotions

Whispering man

Match the intensity

Forgive the weakness

Promote Unity

Seamless

Do whatever it takes

Do what you need

To process the loss

And move on

Interference

 It's true

The tears don't fall

Even though the sadness 

Prevails

It's true 

That I am lost too

Even if it seems

I do not care

There is a chemical 

Affecting me

Making me better

Making me strange 

The pill that helps stop the hurt

Stops the hurt all too well

And leaves me with nothing

But

Interference 

Anew

Bloody knuckles

Hardened soul

Helpless romantic

The open road

Forgiven trespass

Forgotten love

Within temptation

Take off the gloves

Breathing deeply

With closed eyes

Holding steady

Eyes on the prize

It's time

To begin

Refreshed

Reborn

Anew

Now, right now

Pack me up 

Ship me out

Show me love

Pick me up

Dust me off

Show me now 

Take my time

Take it easy

Don't forget how

To show me

You love me

Now